Hi friends! Happy Tuesday.
Today is extra special for Drew + I because we’re celebrating our 2 year marriage anniversary! I’m incredibly thankful + in love with this man.
Our year 2 picture will look a little bit different with this big, beautiful baby belly that we have! 🙂 We both feel incredibly thankful for the love that made this all possible.
I thought it would be really sweet + fun to have Drew on the blog to talk about what we’ve both learned during these two years of marriage. We both wrote our lessons separately, so I loved putting this post together + reading what he wrote. At 2 years, we don’t consider ourselves experts…but, we’ve certainly learned a lot + have truly enjoyed our marriage.
Lessons in Love from Amy + Drew
Drew: Quiet time helps us grow. This just in…I love TV. I really do. But just so we’re clear, I do love my wife much more than TV. Turning off the TV in favor of connecting with Amy has been a beneficial change of pace for me and us. Don’t get me wrong – we enjoy plenty of television together (sports, news, Modern Family, Game of Thrones, Silicon Valley, etc.,), but we also know it’s necessary to shut off the tube to grow our marriage. Having a nice, quiet dinner filled with conversation is a rewarding way to end a busy day of life.
Drew: Sacrifices are a must. See point above. Turn off the TV??? Are you kidding me??? Orrrr….you seriously want me to sit next to you and pay attention to The Bachelor? Whether it’s TV programming, the type of eggs to make for breakfast, or spending time on activities that are not on the top of your priority list, I’ve realized that marriage is all about making these types of sacrifices (and many more). These sacrifices are significant because they make Amy happy and they demonstrate that I care about her and our marriage. In turn, she devotes many extra hours of her life to sports and yardwork than she probably cares to. But, she knows these sacrifices are important to me, and in turn, she is happy knowing that I am happy. In sum, sacrifices = happiness for the couple.
Amy: Put the other person first. There are times that I’m completely blown away be how selfless Drew is + it inspires me to be the same way. We both focus on how we can make the other person smile or how we can make their tough day a little bit easier. Small acts + kind words go a very long way in our marriage + we’re better for it. Simply leaving a note or preparing a meal for the other person is a great place to start. 🙂
Amy: Focus on what is right in front of you. I’ve learned that when we do have a disagreement to focus on what is right in front of us + not to loop in past fights or disagreements. This way we’re able to resolve things much faster + it doesn’t leave either of us feeling attacked. It’s SO important to always keep in mind that the point is to get back on the same page, not to be right. We’re both very good at speaking up if we’re feeling something isn’t going right instead of letting it build up. One of our token phrases is, “can I give you some feedback?” Marriage is a lot of compromise + a lot of learning. You have to realize your partner grew up in a different family that handled things like conflict differently, together you’ll need to come up with your little family’s new strategies + normal. We’ve been getting better + better at conflict over the past 2 years. Figuring out a conflict resolution strategy early on will save you + your partner from drawn out fights in the future.
Drew: It’s important to make time for the two of us on a regular basis. With busy schedules, it’s easy to get caught up in all of the individual responsibilities and interests each of us have. Given that, it isn’t natural to think about a weekly date night with your spouse. However, if you don’t make a point to schedule time with your favorite person in the world, you’re missing out. Making time to share common interests, try something new, or just relax and soak each other in is imperative to enhancing married life and enjoying your time together as a couple.
Amy: Be understanding. In the past when Drew worked really late, I would get upset. I felt as if he wasn’t prioritizing me or his time away from work. Now I understand that he doesn’t want to be there late any more than I want him to be + his job is demanding. Our year 2 strategy was that he picks 1 day a week that he is going to stay extra late (and maybe a morning or 2 he’ll go in early) + we agree on it. This sets the expectation and doesn’t leave me waiting on him. It’s made things a lot smoother for both of us.
Amy: Because I said I would. One night in bed I asked Drew why he loves me so much and he replied, “because I said I would”. I started laughing + told him that wasn’t very romantic + now it serves as a little inside joke between us. But, it is something we do believe. We committed to this marriage + realize that it isn’t always going to be easy. We promised forever + we’re going to stick to it no matter how challenging it gets. Because we said we would.
Happy anniversary to the sweetest husband in the world. I cannot wait to celebrate + I really cannot wait to see you become a daddy.
Thursday on the blog I have my friend Katie from Love, Katie Rose on for an interview!